This is Why You're Single Friday (on Saturday) SPECIAL EDITION: All the Single Ladies

Today's This is Why You're Single Saturday focuses on the ladies. Now obviously I'm a lady myself, so my thoughts probably do not reflect the those of the typical guy. But whatever.

This is why you're single:

• Because you hide in the shadows. That doesn't bode well for your appearance.

Your bed looks nice though...

• Because you advertise the fact that you're not getting any replies...

Maybe if you learned how to use capital letters, you might start getting some replies? Oh, and even though you claim you don't want to have sex on the first date, your many modes of communication make you sound a little bit desperate.

• Because you have clearly mastered the art of the boob shot. Show off the goods, look like you're doing something skanky, but completely avoid the midsection. Check!

Telling guys their face will make you LOL doesn't sound like the best strategy...and since when is "big heart" an interest?

• Because you apparently think you're The Little Mermaid

I mean seriously, what the hell are you doing?!

• Because even though you're smokin' hot, you're also a raging bitch.

Just because you say "not to be a ****" doesn't mean you're not one...I think it will make me feel better to call you shallow, bitch.

Better late than never

My dear friends...please bear with me, as I just began a new school year at a brand new middle school. I left work at 6:00 this evening (Day #1!) and proceeded straight to the bar for a couple brewskis. Posts may be a little less frequent, as I have MUCH less time to spend browsing personal ads, but I promise I will still update. So please keep checking the site, sharing it with your friends, and leaving your supportive or constructive comments. <3